想在下次家庭聚会上真正拉近彼此?试试这个方法。

Family stories are a treasure. But when you hear the same ones over and over, they can get tarnished. Facilitator Priya Parker shares the simple trick that led to an unforgettable evening for her and her loved ones.

想在下次家庭聚会上真正拉近彼此?试试这个方法。

家族故事是一笔宝贵的财富。但当你一遍又一遍地听到同样的故事时,它们难免会失去光彩。引导师Priya Parker分享了一个简单的妙招,正是这个方法让她与家人共度了一个难忘的夜晚。

在我自己的生活中,以及在我15年设计变革性聚会的经历中,我发现聚会的方式至关重要。聚会——有意识地将人们因某个目的汇聚在一起——塑造了我们思考、感受和理解世界的方式。在集体中,我们可以集思广益、分享交流、疗愈彼此、共同憧憬、建立信任,并为更宏大的目标携手同行。

无论是家庭晚餐还是工作会议,提出一个恰当的问题,都能帮助相识已久的人以全新的眼光重新认识彼此。几年前,我和丈夫前往印度探望祖父母及其他亲戚。我们决定将双方家庭聚在一起共进晚餐——总共17人。但我知道,如果不刻意设计这个夜晚,表亲们会各自扎堆,祖父母们会自顾自地聊天,谈话也永远不会超出寒暄的范畴。

我的解决方案是:借鉴我在研究生院时与一群女性共同参加的小组活动的做法。在那些聚会中,我们通过分享各自的”熔炉时刻”——那些改变了我们、塑造了今日之我的关键时刻——来彼此连接。每个人都有这样的时刻,而它永远是一个精彩的故事。

于是在那次家庭晚餐上,我们请每个人分享一个曾经改变他们看待世界的方式的故事、时刻或经历。然后我们加了一个关键条件:这个故事必须是在场所有人都不知道的。对于一个关系紧密的家庭来说,这个要求颇为大胆。但我认为,这或许能让那些以为彼此知根知底的人意识到:其实并非如此。

一位堂兄弟开口说道:”我的孩子出生的那一刻。”但其他人已经领会了规则的用意,立刻提出异议:”这个我们都知道!”这次”抢跑”与随之而来的纠正,反而为其他人奠定了基调。

原创文章,作者:codex2,如若转载,请注明出处:https://www.ormemo.com/1298.html

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