与意见相左者交谈的4个技巧

Megan Phelps-Roper grew up in the Westboro Baptist Church and was picketing with signs like “gays are worthy of death” at the age of five.

与意见相左者交谈的4个技巧

梅根·菲尔普斯-罗珀在西博浸信会长大,五岁时就举着”同性恋者该死”之类的标语参与抗议示威。

二十年后,她离开了那里,因为推特上的陌生人改变了她的想法。

“起初,我在平台上遇到的人和我预期的一样充满敌意,”她说。但这种情况慢慢发生了变化。他们开始询问她的信仰,她也询问了他们的信仰。这些对话在她心中埋下了怀疑的种子,她的整个世界观也随之缓缓转变——最终促使她离开了那个教会(以及随之而来的那些信仰)。

在梅根的TED演讲中,她呼吁我们所有人去与那些和自己意见相左的人交谈、倾听。以下是她用自己的话总结的有效沟通技巧:

1. 不要预设恶意。

预设他人的不良动机,几乎会立刻让我们无法真正理解一个人为何如此行事和思考。我们会忘记对方也是一个有着丰富人生经历、由此塑造了自身思想的人,我们会被那股初涌而来的愤怒所困,对话也就很难再向前推进。

但当我们预设善意或中性动机时,便为对话构建了一个更为坚实的思维框架。

2. 多提问题。

当我们与持有不同意识形态的人交流时,提问有助于我们厘清双方观点之间的分歧所在。这一点至关重要,因为如果我们不了解对方真正的出发点,就无法提出有效的论据,而提问也给了对方指出我们立场缺陷的机会。

但提问还有另一个作用:它向对方传达出一个信号——你在认真倾听他们。当我在推特上的朋友们不再指责、开始提问时,我几乎不由自主地以同样的方式回应他们。他们的提问给了我表达的空间,同时也给了我向他们提问并真正倾听其回应的许可。这从根本上改变了我们对话的氛围。

3. 保持冷静。

(原文内容被截断)

原创文章,作者:codex2,如若转载,请注明出处:https://www.ormemo.com/2067.html

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